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Catholic Date Night Ideas: Highs and Lows of Catholic Marriage
- Stacy Halbach
- Apr 1
- 5 min read
Holy Week is full of ups and downs. Starting with Psalm Sunday, Jesus receives a red-carpet worthy entrance into Jerusalem being praised by the people. Only a few days later, those same people shout, "crucify him!" We celebrate the Institution of the Eucharist one day, the death of Jesus the next. We prayerfully ponder the Stations of the Cross, then the Resurrection! Whew!
Marriage is also full of highs and lows. Just as the Cross of Christ was chosen for Jesus as the instrument of Salvation of all, the cross of Marriage was chosen as an instrument for the salvation of your family. Holy Week reminds us that it's not all hard, either. Some, dare I say most, of marriage is a celebration.
This month, the Date Night Challenge is to use Holy Week as an opportune time to reflect on the highs and lows of your own marriage, then prayerfully surrender your marriage to Jesus.
Catholic Date Night Idea about the Highs and Lows of Marriage
THE LOW: Talk about something you both have been putting off and do it together.
Think: What’s something hard you’ve been putting off? Maybe its yard work, maybe it's painting a room, maybe it’s giving the kids a haircut and trimming their nails, or deep cleaning the carpets.
Sometimes in marriage and family life, we avoid the crosses we know we must carry. Here is an opportunity for you both to help one another carry those crosses.
Maybe your cross is the actual marriage. Maybe you and your spouse are in need of counseling, therapy, spiritual direction and/or a retreat to turn your marriage around.
I highly recommend contacting your Marriage and Family Life director within your diocese as a place to start. He/She should be able to help you find local opportunities for a marriage retreat. I’ve heard incredible things about Retrouvaille.
After you both have decided what hard thing you will do together, roll up both of your sleeves and get to work. Get that thing done, help one another carry this cross.
Hard thing done!✅
THE HIGH: Go out to eat and talk through discussion prompts
What’s your favorite restaurant? Or a restaurant that you two frequent? Matt and I have a family owned Ecuadorian restaurant across town where we seem to have all our important conversations (like when Matt lost his job last year, when I wanted to start this ministry, when we were having some serious marriage struggles, when we talked through a big move because the one baby we were pregnant with was actually two babies, etc.).
It’s our spot, our place to invite the Lord into our big family plan. What’s this place for you? Do you have a favorite place? A place that’s quiet enough to have quality conversation, amazing food, and no rush to leave. Make a reservation if necessary.
When you’ve arrived and sat down, here are some questions to discuss:
“In honor of Holy Week, let’s reflect on some highs and lows of our marriage and offer all of it to Jesus, the good, the bad and the ugly.
What’s one of the best times of our marriage? Favorite memories?
What’s been a struggle for us?
Do we feel like we are putting our marriage first? Am I pouring into the needs of my husband/wife before pouring into our kids?
Are each of us going to God in prayer daily? Do we pray together? Why or why not?
Are there any unhelpful behaviors we need to let die? (Such as too much social media, video games, not enough date nights, desire more sex, desire more help with kids or chores or meal prep, etc.)
SURRENDER TO JESUS: Offer your highs and lows of marriage to Jesus.
When you get home from the restaurant, go somewhere quiet with your spouse and pray the following prayer (or something like it in your own words).
“Lord, thank you for the gift of marriage. Thank you for this vocation that draws both of us closer to you through one another. Help us both to remember that in good times and in bad, in hard times and in easy times, we have an opportunity to surrender our marriage to you.
In reflecting on our marriage so far, we ask you, Jesus, to help us be aware of the things in our marriage that do not bring life (such as bad habits, hurtful behaviors, etc). We surrender these things to you, that you may crucify our selfishness. We ask that you give our efforts new life and help us to love one another better.
In reflecting on our marriage so far, we give you thanks and praise for all the good times we’ve shared. We ask you to send your Holy Spirit to help us foster even more virtue within our marriage, (helpful and selfless behaviors, compassion, mercy, forgiveness, etc).
Help us to remember your kindness, Lord and come to you daily for our nourishment. Help remind us to put one another first so that we may have a healthy marriage in which our children can find security and love.
We ask this through the intercession of your Blessed Mother as we pray… Hail Mary…”
Discussion for each month's Date night:
During each date night, consider adding these discussion questions to kick off conversation:
Have you felt loved by me over this last month? Why or why not?
What can I do to love you better?
Do you have any prayer intentions I could pray for over the next month?
What has been your favorite memory or thing that happened over the last month?
What was the worst thing?
What is one thing you are looking forward to in the coming month?
Before the date ends, be sure to schedule your next date night together!
Going Deeper Ideas:
If you are looking to grow deeper in your faith with your spouse,
Consider reading the same spiritual book and talking about it in the evenings or every Saturday morning. Here are some suggestions (these are affiliate links with no extra charge to you-thanks for supporting our ministry!):
Another area for study together could be the Holiness of Sex within Marriage. Read through and discuss the blog post I wrote on the subject based on a talk Matt and I gave at a marriage retreat.
Free Resources for Catholic Married Life
One of the best things you can do for your marriage is to schedule regular date nights. We suggest AT LEAST monthly date nights, preferably weekly. To foster this habit, we will write a monthly Date Night Challenge! This challenge involves Catholic Date Night ideas as well as some questions to ask one another.
Mary wants your marriage to be good, holy and healthy! Bring your marriage to her and for her prayers! I wrote this workbook to help you pray for your marriage!
How to Create a Prayer Routine as Husband and Wife: Praying together is one of the best things you can do for the health of your marriage and for the spiritual growth of your children! No matter if you have never prayed with your spouse or if you want to shake up your current routine, we wrote this $5 download to help married couples find a prayer routine they love!
We want to support your Catholic Marriage and Family Life however we can! So check out www.jumpincatholic.com and subscribe to receive a free resource called 5 Ways to Strengthen Your Marriage and Family Life!
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